kvmb Chapter 3 Elopement
Chapter 3 Elopement
[Oh dear, it's the Minister of Works' zodiac year this year! All the underpants in the house have been replaced with bright red ones.]
[He not only changed into bright red himself, but also forbade anyone else in the household from wearing bright red underpants, believing it would steal his luck.]
[Superstition, feudal superstition!]
The Minister of Works immediately felt a tightness in his buttocks.
He looked back irritably, his silent rage escaping his lips: "What are you looking at? Did I eat your rice while wearing red underwear?"
Shen Zhiyi continued to watch the surveillance footage related to the Minister of Works.
After watching for the time it takes to drink a whole cup of tea.
[When the old emperor leaves court, how can I tactfully ask the Minister of Works where he bought those red underpants? By the way, do they have women's versions? Hmm, wearing men's isn't out of the question either.]
The old emperor and his ministers were shocked.
Why are you suddenly eyeing someone else's underwear?
You're a young lady, be a little more reserved!
No wonder the Minister of Works wouldn't let anyone wear red underpants like him. Ever since he started wearing bright red, his luck has been on an all-time high. First, he was promoted from Vice Minister to Minister; then his daughter married the Fourth Prince; then his eldest son became the top scholar in the imperial examination; and now his wife, the shrew, has become exceptionally gentle this year. He's living a very comfortable life.
[My goodness, Minister of Works, where did you buy your underwear? I need the link!]
A strong-willed woman like her would be so upset by not being able to connect with someone that she couldn't sleep at night.
Now it wasn't just Shen Zhiyi who was upset; everyone in the main hall, including the old emperor, was staring at the Minister of Works' backside.
His gaze was intense.
【Oh, I found it! The Minister of Works' underpants were made by the embroiderers at Wangyue Embroidery Shop. I'll go buy a pair after get off work.】
After finding the link, Shen Zhiyi contentedly shifted her gaze.
[Ouch, the Crown Prince hasn't bathed in a month! I'd better stay away, or I'll smell bad.]
The next second, a large area around the crown prince was cleared.
The Minister of Works breathed a sigh of relief; finally, there weren't so many burning gazes fixed on his hook.
The old emperor glanced at his eldest son with disdain and immediately issued an imperial edict ordering him to get a good scrub.
[What a unique imperial edict! Recorded in the daily records, it's worthy of repeated study by later generations.]
The crown prince looked at the old emperor in disbelief, his eyes almost popping out of their sockets, as if he had suffered some great injustice.
"Your Majesty, you cannot treat your son like this. What have I done wrong?"
The old emperor, his face dark, gritted his teeth and said, "Take him away and take the crown prince to bathe!"
[It's definitely time to make bathing mandatory; otherwise, the Crown Prince could go a year without bathing, as has happened before.]
The old emperor's breath hitched.
How could I not have taken a shower for such a long time as a year?
He has been a terrible father.
"Your Majesty, you cannot do this."
"Father, you can't do this to your son!"
The old emperor couldn't help but burst into a tirade: "I just asked you to take a bath, why are you yelling like I'm going to kill you! You unfilial son, you've infuriated me! Take him away!"
The Crown Prince's influence ultimately reached the old emperor.
The old emperor had it tough; few of his sons were easy to manage. Oh, and those not his own weren't easy to manage either.
[Haha, when this idle prince heard that Consort Chen had been thrown into the laundry department, he rushed over there without even eating breakfast.]
The Vice Minister of Rites, who had just relaxed, immediately became anxious again.
He skillfully slid to his knees and began to kowtow frantically.
The old emperor's eye twitched violently.
No, why did Prince Xian go to see Consort Chen?
Prince Xian was the son of the old emperor's brother, and he died trying to save the old emperor.
【hiss.】
【OMG.】
The old emperor's harem was indeed quite colorful.
The old emperor, sitting on the dragon throne, began to fidget.
The other ministers secretly pricked up their ears.
Because the old emperor was incompetent.
The old emperor: This sentence can be omitted; there is no need to repeat it multiple times.
It's all the old emperor's fault; even drugs couldn't cure him.
Old Emperor: Enough! I really mean enough!
[Therefore, the concubines in the harem began to find ways to amuse themselves, such as occasionally inviting opera troupes from outside the palace to come and listen to their songs.]
The reason the Prince of Xian was called the Prince of Xian was probably because he was utterly ignorant and incompetent, spending his days just babbling on and on.
The old emperor: Slander! This is slander! "Leisure" doesn't mean having nothing to do; it means being carefree and content. I hope the Prince of Leisure can live a carefree life. How come Shen Zhiyi makes it sound like he's doing something to his old friend's child!
[Today he'd go to one opera troupe in the capital, tomorrow he'd go to another. Once, by chance, he stumbled upon an opera troupe that was going to perform for Consort Chen in the inner palace, and so Prince Xian sneaked in.]
Everyone realized it.
Is this what they can hear?
It would be great if these things could be written into the daily records.
It is worth studying repeatedly by future generations!
The old emperor was so angry he almost smashed the pure gold dragon throne to pieces.
[Consort Chen spotted Prince Xian in the crowd at first glance. After using him, she found him satisfactory and, in order to please the Imperial Concubine, offered him to her.]
[After using it, the Imperial Concubine gave it a five-star review, and then introduced it to Consort Wang, who had entered the palace with her.]
[After using it, Wang Zhaorong gave it a five-star review, and then introduced Xian Wang to eight of her girlfriends.]
During that period, many concubines in the harem were living very comfortably, while others, unaware of this, curiously inquired about the Prince's link.
[Haha ...
[As expected, no matter the time, strong-willed women always ask for links.]
Shen Zhiyi became more and more excited as she looked, completely unaware of how tense the atmosphere was around her.
Her eyes emitted a strange light as she stared intently at the top of everyone's heads.
[Oh dear, ten times the speed, ten times the speed! Let me see which concubines are here.]
[Oh, so there's a daughter of a Vice Minister of the Ministry of Personnel.]
Oh, and there's also the daughter of the Minister of Revenue.
【Yo…】
……
Shen Zhiyi excitedly mobilized her troops like a king of hell.
The courtiers in the palace went from being terrified to numb.
So what?
The old emperor went from being angry at first to reflecting on whether he should have allowed fewer daughters of ministers and nobles into the harem.
This is so troublesome.
[Damn, my mouth is dry.]
The old emperor laughed in anger.
You have such a small mouth, what are you talking about?
[From this perspective, Consort Chen was practically Prince Xian's guide, and not only that, she was also the mother of his first child. No wonder he rushed to the palace as soon as he heard the news of Consort Chen's incident.]
This is what we call staying true to our original aspirations and never forgetting our roots.
"puff."
[Huh? What happened? Who dares to drink water during court?]
When Shen Zhiyi looked up, she found that the old emperor was gone, the attendant on the other side was gone, and the great scholar was gone too.
Well, she's left all alone standing here.
The old emperor ran away? Great!
Shen Zhiyi turned to the side, lowered his head, and lewdly pulled a meat bun from his sleeve, taking a big bite.
[The dog emperor has to go to court before dawn every day, I'm so hungry my stomach is practically sticking to my back.]
While sneaking a bite of a steamed bun, Shen Zhiyi didn't forget to keep an eye on Chen Zhaoyi's movements.
[Holy crap, this idle prince is actually planning to elope with Consort Chen!]